Because of this country's view on life, when my daughter died at 16 weeks gestation in 2000, my husband and I were not only denied the option to see her after birth, but had to fight the hospital to get access to her body later. She was called products of conception, medical waste and we were told she had been disposed of. Thank God she was not and we did eventually get to see her and were given permission to have her cremated with dignity. " You want a funeral home to pick up the medical waste removed from your body?" was the question. Yes, we want a funeral home to pick up our daughter. Even though we did get to see her, she was in a small jar with formaldehyde, so I never did get to kiss her good-bye. But she was fully formed, perfect in every way. She was even smiling.
I understand that there are extenuating circumstances that make abortion palatable, or even necessary (in ectopic pregnancies for instance). I counsel parents who have chosen to interrupt a pregnancy when faced with the choice of one hour of life with their child or wait for stillbirth. I have grieved with parents who believe with all their hearts that the choice they made was for the comfort of their child and would give anything to have them here. But the vast majority of abortions are not performed in these cases, they are performed because a woman believes that death for the child would be better than parenting for her. And because of these women, my child was disrespected. After all, we cannot believe it is a child when it dies naturally and not believe it when someone doesn't want it. We want to. We want to believe we are big enough to have both in our minds, but we aren't. Not most of us. Not me, and apparently not the hospital I had Rose at. I believe my much wanted baby was just as much a baby as a child who was not wanted. They believed she was medical waste, just like the abortion they performed earlier that day.
I don't have any pictures of my sweet girl, but I do have pictures of her brother, who also died at almost the same gestation 2 years later. These are fairly graphic, but I believe they say more about the humanity of these children than words ever could.
Please pray for those marching today. Please pray for President Obama as he considers what to do with the FOCA . Please pray his heart will be changed toward the unborn and that life can be respected in this country.